Do not let a man tell you ‘he does not love you’ twice

By Christine Nakalungi

Everyone has been rejected at some point and no matter how beautiful you think you are, there is that one person you wish could see it but turns a blind eye. It has happened to the best in the game and it surely has happened to even the young and naive. But what should you do if a man tells you that he does not like you? Should you switch to skimpy skirts or upgrade your makeup to attract him? I do not think so.

Crushes come and go but before they fade away, there is always an inner battle with feelings. You like him but he does not like you. As a matter of fact, he has never paid attention to you or even given you a glance. To him, you are stuck in the friend zone and the earlier you embrace that truth, the faster you will avoid further embarrassment.

Shamira had a crush on her classmate for more than a year. She tried to be more but unfortunately she got stuck in the friend zone. She had tried to express her feelings to the man but he kept introducing new girlfriends to her not knowing that she is bleeding inside. She got tired of playing the game and decided to seek help. Most friends advised her to express her feelings in a more clear way so she told the man about her feelings but the he turned her down. She however failed to let go. Instead, she devised other means to trap him but all fetched the same results.

One day as she visited her grandmother for holidays, she shared her dilemma with her cousins who made it a point to involve grandmother. At first, their grandmother listened to everyone’s amusing tactics and when they were done, the old woman got involved.

“If a man loves you, he will approach you but if he does not, not even the many layers of makeup will lure him. The first rejection is hard to take in considering you have shared your feelings with a man but waiting for him to reject you for the second time will crash you. If a man should reject you, he should only do it once. If you are not strong enough to move on, slap yourself if that will remind you that there are other men in the world. One man’s meat is another man’s poison. So, if he does not like you, go ahead and live your life, a better person will come along.”
After last week’s column about ‘a girl’s no meaning no’. I think both women and men should pick a leaf from grandma’s advice.

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